E228: All You Have To Do Is Ask, with Dr. Wayne Baker (Part 2)

January 16, 2024



Do you know how to ask for what you want?


Do you know how to ask for what you want?


Part 2 of my conversation with Dr. Wayne Baker


We continue our discussion about how salespeople (and everyone, really) can improve their ability to ask for what they want, as well as what gets in the way – mentally – of going for it!



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  • Show Transcript

    Jason: Welcome back to another episode of the sales experience podcast. Welcome back to part two of my conversation with Dr. Wayne Baker. We are going to continue where we left off, talking about how valuable and important it is to ask for what you want, where that fits in with salespeople, how that applies, where people struggle.


    We're going to cover all of that in his smart framework and what he does and what he is focused on helping people with. So make sure if you haven't already subscribed to the podcast, you can get episodes every single day and you can check out the cutter consulting group website to find the show notes and links to everything that Dr. Wayne is working on. So here you go. Here's part two.


    Dr. Wayne: Because then it's a hard request to turn down, but you're the boss that says, Hey, this person's thought this through. I send them on this training. They're clear why they want to do it. And the benefit to me as well as to them and the organization, it's hard to turn down a request like that, a thoughtful request.


    Jason: And it's fascinating because two things come to mind when I'm hearing you go through this. One is. I know from a management leadership perspective, when I've had people ask me for help, for resources, for information, for coaching, to go to a seminar, whatever that might be, especially if it's set up in the right way, that I am super excited they're doing it and I will give them whatever I can to help them because it's that person out of the group that I know if they're making that request, it's because they're open, they're curious, they want to expand, they want to learn.


    And they're technically more valuable to me and the organization because they care about progressing and not being stuck or staying in their comfort zone or doing what they're always doing, like they're looking at ways to improve. And to me, I see that as the sign of somebody who's striving to be or is a professional, which is they're willing to look at.


    The game footage, the recordings of their calls or their meetings. They want the feedback. They want to grow. They want coaching. They want help. And yeah, to your point, I mean, I know that some people hesitate in asking for anything because they're afraid of what that might make them look like, right? Like they're not.


    Good enough, or they should already know that and they're not doing it right. And from a leadership side, I will say like the people who ask the questions during meetings and the ones that ask for help outside of that. Those are the ones that I usually see go further.


    Dr. Wayne: What you just said reminds me of another common barrier and that is over reliance on self reliance.


    I think this is especially true for salespeople. They feel that they have to be totally self reliant and do it all themselves. But that's impossible for anyone. You could be a lot more effective, more productive, perform at a higher level, be more satisfied by getting resources from other people. You mentioned a bunch of them that are really important for everyone and I think especially for people in sales.


    You know, to get mentoring, to get coaching, to ask for feedback, to have a session recorded and to listen to what people say about that and how you can improve that pitch or how he improved how you related to that person. And as you say, that indicates the person wants to grow. They want to learn, they want to develop.


    That's what a boss wants. That person is going to be a lot more valuable. So, I would say that the boss should be a role model of the behavior that they want. So, they should encourage the members of their sales team to speak up and to ask for what they need to be more effective at their jobs. It's going to make the individual better, the team better, and oh, by the way, it's going to make the boss better as well, look better.


    But it should be that the boss is saying, look, I want to hear what you need to be more effective and to be more successful, and then I will tap my network and my resources. to help you.


    Jason: And I think that really goes to the mindset of what you're focused on with the book and everything that you're doing and what's online, which is that mindset of asking and knowing what you want and then making those requests for the right reasons in the right ways with the right framework.


    Because I'll tell you again, as a sales leader in organizations, it is cumbersome and tiring. to pull everybody up all the time, right, is to convince people they should learn more or grow more and get them out of being stuck. Nothing more exciting than having someone push a leader for more, right, and want to do more.


    And if that's inside of you. I think that's an important lesson to make sure and don't hold back. Do it in the right framework because I've had some people ask me in a not the right framework and it doesn't work and it actually goes the opposite way. It makes me not want to help them. But yeah, I mean, I think that's the key.


    And so then the second part I was going to say. Relative to salespeople asking is that generally what I've seen for people who struggle with making their requests or asking in kind of the framework that you're talking about, Dr. Wayne, is that they probably also struggle in that same way in their sales career because they probably handle their sales conversations in the same way, whereas they're not clear, they're not digging deep, they're not doing the things that we were talking about.


    And so then that request to a manager, a request to somebody on the team is pretty much a reflection of how they operate. So if you're struggling with people to get your requests met, I wonder how much of that is just something they can work on that might be an overarching, I wouldn't say symptom, but an indication.


    Dr. Wayne: Oh, absolutely. I think that you will see common patterns across the relationships you have with your boss or with members of the sales team. The commonalities with how you interact with and relate to customers. And even you're like at home that a lot of these relationship principles, how to ask and make appropriate requests, those criteria apply across all those different domains.


    Like for example, I have an 18 year old who's now graduating from high school and he's starting college in the fall. And I find that when I make a request of him to do something, that the M of SMART is really important, the Y of the request, why it's meaningful. I try to avoid the method that my dad used with me, which is You know what's coming, right?


    Jason: I already know what you're going to say. I already know it.


    Dr. Wayne: You're going to do it because I told you so, right? Yep. Which gets compliance, but not engagement, right? Engagement means you want to do it rather than you have to do it.


    Jason: Yeah, and it's interesting because we're talking about salespeople, managers, leaders in organizations and in life.


    And I think you're absolutely correct. I mean, as much as people try to show up for their job and then pretend to be something different or play a part, it's usually tough to do that long term. And most people show up the same everywhere, which is why I finished my podcast for everyone listening. They already know this, that everything in life is sales, right?


    Like every conversation with the boss, with the manager, with your team, with a significant other. Kids. I mean, that's all some kind of persuasion conversation and in your framework talking about asking. But I think that why is so important, both for getting what you want in any conversation, any request and then specifically in sales.


    I mean, one of the things I tell people All the time is if you need the prospect to do something for you, or you're going to ask them a whole bunch of questions, which is basically an ask, right? Like you're asking for this response and time from that person, right? If we look at the sales processes, mini ask, not the big ask of, Hey, we'll grab your credit card so we can do this.


    But like all these mini asks throughout the conversation. Is to tell them why, like I want to ask lots of questions because I want to understand you, your situation and if this is going to be a good fit and when you do that meaningful step in your ask and set up the framework, then there's going to be a lot of compliance and engagement where someone goes, okay, now that makes sense.


    It's not just somebody asking me a bunch of questions, giving me the third degree. And then I'm going to be defensive. Hey, it's Jason here. We'll be right back to the podcast. But first, are you ready to change the way you view your selling role and become a sales professional? Do you have a team that is hungry for new ways to improve and grow?


    If so, I have various coaching and consulting programs available. That might be great tools to help you achieve your goals to learn more about the ways we can work together and to book your free sales, power call, go to Jason cutter. com. Now let's get back to the episode. Yeah, absolutely.


    Dr. Wayne: And to do it in the proper spirit, which is. You are truly trying to understand the other person, the other person's needs, their goals and objectives, and to see, as you said, whether there's a fit, whether your product or service is the right one, and to be willing to say, you know what, based on all what I've learned, I said, I don't think this is the right product for you, or the right service, which is very, very hard.


    You know, if you're measured on a quota, and you've got commissions, and there's a leaderboard you're thinking of, and it's at the end of the quarter, right? It's hard. But you know, I think that in the long run, you're You're much better off and be much more successful in the long run. I know somebody who took this approach when they were selling insurance programs to large institutions, large organizations like universities or corporations.


    So these, every sale is an enormous sale. And the loss of that sale, a sale done away is an

    enormous, enormous loss. And They said, you know, the way that we used to do it is that we would go in, this person was telling me, and say, we basically would say what the customer team wants to hear, knowing that we can't deliver on all of that, and no one can deliver on all of that, and so they said, you know, we're going to try something different, which is to say, Okay.


    No, we can't deliver on that. And none of our competitors can deliver on that as well. Here is what we can deliver on. And we promise we'll deliver on those things. And he said, you know, we're going to probably lose a sale here and there as a result. But in the long run, the positive impact on our reputation as being honest and genuine and truly taking the client's needs into account is going to pay off in the long run. And that's what they discovered, but they had to weather it for them a little bit of a drop in their sales in order to get those longer term reputational benefits.


    Jason: And one of the lessons I take from that story in particular for salespeople as well is.


    That it's not always going to be what the prospect wants to hear, even if it is that you can help them. A lot of prospects, whether it's a consumer or it's a business, have this ideal dream of what the perfect solution is that also has no pain, no downside and is perfect and is probably also cheap. And so that doesn't exist.


    Like your story, right? Like we want somebody who comes in and fixes all of this. It's like, that's not possible. Like we don't do it. Nobody else does it. And I think it's important to embrace the role, especially as a sales professional, where your job isn't to push everyone into a solution. Your job is to find the right solution.


    And sometimes you've got to be delivering some less than pleasant news that's there's a silver lining. You can still help them might not be what they want. And then you have to stand by that. Absolutely. And understand that there might be losses. There might be people who say no, but at the end of the day, you're doing the right thing.


    And then you're also not writing a check. That you can't cash because you've overcommitted to what you could do.


    Dr. Wayne: Right, or you close a sale and down the road the customer is really unhappy with you. Yeah. And felt like you sold them a bill of goods. And, you know, then says things about you that's going to hurt your reputation.


    And we all know that bad reputational news follow goes a lot further and faster than good reputations, right? Yeah. So there's that to think about as well. Not just the immediate sale, but the long term impact on your reputation. Yeah.


    Jason: And then going back to this conversation of asking, which is something I do training on as well, which is the power of telling somebody no when in those situations where it's not a good fit at all, but then also doing that second step, which is this whole thing we're talking about, which is the ask and asking that person specifically, or making sure they understand that you value their referrals and that connection.


    And that, you know, if there's anyone else that they know of. That you'd love to help them. I see salespeople who are afraid to do that, ask whether the sale is successful or not. And they just aren't asking for referrals or introductions or connections. And there seems to be so many reasons for that. Yeah.


    Dr. Wayne: And it's also asking for a testimonial where you say that some salespeople are reluctant to ask for that, even with a satisfied customer, they have another customer and they say, well, I don't know, but you need to go back to that first one and say, Hey, who's happy. Right. Would you give a testimonial for me?


    Would you speak? to this other potential customer and let them know what the experience was like for you and how well the product or the service worked out for you. That most people are delighted to do that. Remember they, in fact, what we've shown in our research is that people feel bad when they say no, right?


    Jason: Is that people really do want to help. And so why, mindset wise, Do, let's say, people not ask for those testimonials from happy customers.


    Dr. Wayne: I think it comes back to some of those barriers. It's the over reliance on self reliance or a fear of rejection or not knowing how to make the request, not thinking of those five smart criteria.


    Sometimes I found that even in an opportunity where you can ask for anything that sometimes people get stuck and they go, wow, I've had people kind of say, I've always wanted to be in a situation where I could ask anyone for anything. And I don't know what to ask for it. Right. Because they haven't been clear about what their goals are, what they're trying to achieve, and then what are the resources that they need.


    So some thoughtfulness and some clarity about what you're trying to do, what you're. I also encourage people to create a long term vision of success and to actually write a narrative about that. And you know, what's that preferred future that you want? And the best way to do this, in fact, I have all my MBA students do this.


    It's one of their final projects is they have to write a vision of what success looks like for them three to five years down the road. And it has to be written in the present tense as if we took a time machine into the future. And they were showing me all the evidence around them. of what had happened, what they had created.


    And what they found is that when you do that, and you have that, you're much more likely to create that future. Because you're really clear about the future that you want. So you can think about in sales or any profession as well, saying, okay, what, three or five years down the road, what does success look like for you?


    And actually write it out as a narrative, vivid details. You know, as if we went forward in a time machine and you were showing everyone about all these great things that had happened, if you've got that in mind, then you can start backing up from there and say, well, what do I need? What do we need to ask for?


    Jason: That's it for part two. I will see you tomorrow for part three of the conversation with Dr. Wayne Baker, as always keep in mind that everything in life is sales and people remember the experience you give them.



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By Jason Cutter February 26, 2025
How Can You Predict The Future Of Sales Ops? One of the keys to sales success is to be able to predict the future – what that other person is thinking, what they might say, what they will experience, how they will feel about the product/service. But what can you do – from a sales ops leadership perspective – to predict the future in masse of all the potential customers that will flow into and out of the sales process/funnel? That is a really tough one, but it is doable. Meeting Prospective Customers Where They Are The key is to always meet the prospective customers where they are and with the experience they hope to find. It’s a common theme now in these articles because it’s important AND widely disregarded – your potential customers do not care about you, your sales team, your company, your industry. They don’t care about your stats, your testimonials, your logos. They don’t care about your mission statement or your values. They only care about themselves. They also firmly believe that there is currently unlimited choice for any product/service, which means that everything in their mind is a commodity. Easily replaceable and interchangeable. Nothing (other than iPhones…which you can only get from Apple) is special to consumers unless they feel like it should be special. Are You Still Making It All About You? There is a good chance you are still running a marketing, sales funnel that is all about you. I bet if I looked at your company’s website that from the top down it’s all about you (the company). How great you are. What you do for people. What you have done for others. I bet if I tried to speak with your sales team, I will be made to go through your process whether I like it or not. Maybe fill out a form and wait for a response. Or made to call into a toll free number, even though I don’t want to talk to someone yet. Or made to use a chat widget on a site to get started. I bet when I speak with your sales team, 70-80% of the conversation will be about them, your company, and how amazing you all believe you are. This is all fair. No one starts a company to be mediocre. The goal is to provide value and make money. The missing piece, again like I said above, is no one cares about your goals. They only care about themselves. Predicting What Customers Want From The Sales Experience Back to your mission as sales ops leader – predict what massive amounts of prospective customers are going to want from the Sales Experience. It’s why I wrote about it last week and even offered up a book for free to help in any way that I can. To succeed at your mission, you have to stay ahead of the curve of what the public, and specifically – your buying demographic, psychographic, and valuegraphics, want from that experience. Key Questions To Shape The Sales Experience Do they want to call, text, email or chat? Probably all of them…so can you offer each one? (Don’t make someone decide if they want to go through your hoops…remove all the hoops) Do they need to see pricing online – should it be available and transparent? (In most cases, yes) What sales process will be ideal for moving the most people through the sales conversation to a successful outcome? (More discovery, empathy, active listening. More front-loaded about them, not you. Use the Authentic Persuasion Pathway as your model) Who are the decision makers? Is that individual going to decide or do they need to check with others for approval? (Set them up for success, and don’t force them to make a decision in the moment – you will just lose the potential sale) What type of follow up do they want and need until they make the buying decision? What type of post-purchase follow up would go above and beyond a) their expectations and b) what others in your industry do? If there is an ‘onboarding’ stage after the sale – how can you make that actually customer centric and successful? (It is rarely both) Can You Stay Ahead of the Curve? Remember – evolution is natural. The buying public is always evolving their desired sales experience. Can you predict the future of what they want so that when they encounter your company it matches what they were hoping to find – both in the experience and the solution to their need?
By Jason Cutter February 25, 2025
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By Jason Cutter February 25, 2025
The Oracle’s Role in The Matrix If you have seen the Matrix movies, starring Keanu Reeves (as Neo), then you are familiar with an Oracle. In the movies, the Oracle knows what will happen. She has seen it, and it is predestined. In the Oracles mind there is no such thing as free will. In the first Matrix movie, Neo goes to visit her and knocks a vase off the shelf, and it hits the ground and breaks. Right before he hits it, she says “Don’t worry about the vase.” Neo says, “How did you know?” Then the Oracle responds with “What’s really going to bake your noodle later on, is would you still have broken it if I hadn’t said anything.” Becoming an Oracle in Sales Your mission as a sales professional is to be an Oracle for your prospects and clients. To know the future. Then be able to see around corners, as they say. Which means you know what is going to happen before it happens, because you have enough experience that you have become a psychic. You want to be able to predict, with amazing accuracy: What will happen next What will happen after that What issues will pop up What your prospect/client is thinking before they think it What concerns they might have before they have them Eliminating the Fear of the Unknown During your presentation/demo you want to set the expectation of what is going to occur next. Remember, humans fear the unknown. They want to avoid risk as much as possible. Your sales presentation is risky and dangerous and very unknown. They don’t know if you have good intentions or not. Are you going to persuade them? Are you going to try to manipulate them? Are you going to overcharge them? Will you actually care about what they need and want? Dealing with salespeople is so scary. Yet they still need and/or want something, so it’s the dangerous game they must mentally play. Guiding the Buyer Step by Step When you explain what you are going to do in part 1 of your process, and then what that part is done you let them know the plan for part 2, and so on – they will be at ease in the moment. They will feel like they have control over this portion, that there is an exit they can take if they don’t want to proceed. That level of control will help them accept the risk of part 1, and part 2, and part 3. Tell them what you will do. Do it. Tell them what you did. This will validate that you can be trusted. Predicting Thoughts and Feelings The next level is being able to predict what they will think and feel before they do. You can use this information in your presentation (without telling them what you are doing). You can also verbalize it, which could sound like “I am guessing from experience that you are probably wondering about _____, so let’s cover that right now.” Or “most people I speak with ask about _____.” They will think – wow this person knows what I am thinking, he/she is in my mind! And that’s a good thing. A really good thing. Conclusion The more they feel like you know what you are doing, know what they are thinking, know what they are afraid of – the more they trust you as a Guide. Because Guides only know what they know because they have helped other Heros successfully accomplish their journeys. Your mission as a sales professional: Become an Oracle.
By Jason Cutter February 19, 2025
What does it take to build the ideal Sales Experience? Why does it even matter? Maybe you think you already have one. You are a professional sales ops leader. You have put everything you can in place to help your salespeople sell more. You have optimized the processes so that your sales team can focus on one thing – selling. But I promise – even if you think all of that is true, it’s not. The Reality: No Perfect Sales Experience Exists I have never seen any company or team with the ‘ideal’ Sales Experience and operation. And to be honest – I have never built one successfully. Why would I admit that? Because the ideal Sales Experience is aspirational and business, teams, processes, and customer needs/desires are constantly changing. So as soon as you put new processes in place, something else needs to change and evolve. The Scalable Sales Success Iceberg In my Scalable Sales Success Iceberg – there are 24 categories that, when built out, create a scalable sales machine – where you can add in an input and get way more output. I would love to see companies have all 24 categories set up and running optimally. But that’s not even possible – because, as I mentioned, things are always changing. Focusing on the Biggest Levers Here is the key – to build the ideal Sales Experience takes focus on the biggest levers. The ones that, when pulled, create the biggest and best results. There are many processes and systems that you can put in place – but those are going to get you a few percentage points of improvement. Instead of putting it all in here, I want to make you a special offer. Email me at jason@sellingeffectiveness.com with your mailing address, and I will mail you the book that I co-wrote with Nick Glimsdahl called Reasons Not To Focus On The Sales Experience. It will be your starter guide, facilitating the creation of your ideal Sales Experience.
By Jason Cutter February 18, 2025
The Numbers Game Mentality is a Losing Strategy Sales is no longer a “numbers game.” You cannot succeed, long term, by focusing on volume of activity. Making a million dials, sending a million emails, knocking on a million doors (the first two are way easier than that last one) is a scorched earth strategy that will sink your business. You can’t out-dial a bad sales process. It will lead to even more bad online reviews. You can’t out-email a terrible sales funnel process that requires people to jump through poorly planned hoops. You can’t out-knock your way past slimy tactics and bad products/services. The Danger of the "Every No Gets Me Closer to a Yes" Mindset The whole “every no gets me one step closer to a yes” mentally is dangerous. That mindset and strategy assumes that it’s a numbers game. That the only thing that matters is finding the right person who will buy from you. Potentially, no matter what you even say – they are just ready to buy. Not only will this destroy any online reputation you have it will also wreak havoc on your team. It is the fastest and best way to burn out your team. It will lead to a revolving door or hiring, training, and quitting as people realize how unfun the game is you have built and how hard it is to be successful. It will also feel like a mismatch – very few people (and hopefully even less over time) are long-term excited about the business model of calling 500 people a day in hopes of making a few sales. If It’s Not a Numbers Game, Then What Is It? It’s quality over quantity. [Now…note – it does take a certain quantity of activity to fill a sales pipeline. So I am not saying that your sales team can just sit and wait for people to fall into their pipeline with money in hand.] It’s about the Sales Experience. It’s about your team ensuring that they are providing the right and best experience for that potential customer – in a way that sets them up to get into the buying mood and mode. All that matters is the Sales Experience. How can you support your team in terms of the quantity of activity to fill a pipeline, and then the quality of interaction that leads to sales? What Does an Ideal Sales Experience Look Like? What does that look like – the ideal Sales Experience? It’s when your team understands that the potential customer they are speaking with only cares about themselves. They don’t care about the salesperson, your company or the product. They are only focused on themselves. It’s when the Discovery/Empathy portion of the conversation is the most important part. Does your team realize that everything after Discovery – when done right – is just a presentation of the solution? It’s the fact that when you combine the parts of the Authentic Persuasion Pathway (Rapport + Empathy + Trust + Hope + Urgency) that the assumptive close is all you need. If your team is having to ask for the sale they are doing sales wrong. And don’t confuse earning the right to close with asking for the sale. The Sales Leader’s Role in Creating a World-Class Sales Experience Your job as a sales leader is to ensure your team understands that the only thing – above all else – is the sales experience they provide to each potential customer. That customer knows that they have the power and the feeling of unlimited choice. Which means they will decide who to give their money to based on the experience they have with buying from a company. How can you shift your team away from the numbers game mentality to actually providing a world class sales experience to each and every person they speak with?
By Jason Cutter February 17, 2025
The Abundance of Options Today we all have lots of options. While writing this I could speak into my phone and order whatever I want. I can get food delivered before I finish writing this article. I could get a TV delivered to my door before I wake up tomorrow. When someone wants to buy something, they are armed with as much information as they want to access. They can research, read reviews, and watch videos about a product or company. The Shift in Power to the Buyer Because of this, the power balance of sales has shifted away from the salesperson and company to the buyer. Knowledge is power – and they now have all the knowledge they want. With knowing that they have ultimate choice of what to buy (internet and globalization has led to the ability to order anything you want from anywhere…so you are no longer limited to the stores you can drive to and what they have on hand), it means that everything is a commodity in their minds. Nothing is unique or special. Everything is interchangeable. Does the Sales Experience Even Matter? So, this means the sales experience doesn’t matter anymore. There is no reason to put effort into the sales process, the conversations with potential customers. No value in spending time trying to ‘help’ people – since they just view products, salespeople, and companies as interchangeable. You are not special, so there is no benefit in caring. They will walk into your store, and they will decide what they want. They fill out your online for, and they decide if they answer when you call and how the call will go. They walk up to your event/booth, and they decide how the interaction will go and if they want to listen to your elevator pitch. They will let you know if they are interested in moving forward. They will let you know how they want to buy. So, like I said above, there is no real value anymore in the sales experience. Or could it actually be valuable? Is it possible that all that matters IS the sales experience? If people feel they have ultimate information and control of the buying process, how do they decide on what to buy and who to buy from? When I search on Amazon for a product type I have never purchased before, how do I pick? When I want to go shopping for garden supplies for the house, how do I pick where to go? When I need to buy a new fridge, who will I hand my money over to? The cheapest place with terrible service? The place with reasonable prices and great service? The Sales Experience Shapes the Decision I choose based on the sales experience that I will receive. With everything else being equal, I (and I believe most people) will select the place to shop at or the products to buy online based on the experience I receive. To me all that matters is the experience. While I am trying to buy something. Once I receive it – ensure it does what I need it to do. With the feeling of unlimited choices, it can actually be harder now to buy something that in the past. People get into analysis paralysis more often. Which means that for consumers to buy something new they need help. They need a professional salesperson. They need a sales experience that matches their expectations. They want a guide who will help them make the right decision for them, with an experience that goes above and beyond what more people receive any more when they walk into a store, call a company’s toll-free number, or visit a website and have to fill out a form. If you want to succeed in sales – the only thing that matters is the sales experience you provide.
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